Thanksgiving!

is finally here! Next thing ya know we'll be hiding gifts from kids pretending to be Santa. I'm in a great mood today.

This morning me and Tyler went to the Charlotte Rescue Mission and volunteered. We set up the dining area for the lunch that was going to be served. We placed table cloths, center pieces, and Tyler was in charge of silverware being placed. Folding napkins was the hardest work but after it was all said and done, the dining room looked nice.

Tyler seemed to not have a very happy attitude this morning. I've told him over and over again about less fortunate people and having compassion. But today he was in selfish mode. I had to break out the "pinch" a few times. Lucky for him we were surrounded by strangers b/c I really wanted to knock his azz on the floor..

At any rate, here is a photo of us at the Mission.


Here's also a photo from lsat night. Last night I went to a "lock and key" party and had a blast. Except the person who had the key to my lock happened to be the guy from church that i have been going out with..Somehow I felt short changed~ The best part of the night for me was getting all kinds of compliments on my hair! I think it's safe to say that I am fully confident with my hair now. The strangest compliment was a couple that grabbed my arm. The man kept staring at my hair and the woman was silent. I was sort of wondering if they were trying to get me in a orgy or something and then she finally said "He's in awe of your hair." Apparently he wanted my hair for himself but he said he could never find anyone to do it so he just loc'd it. He asked me all about my routine and stuff. Interesting.



I'm about to go bake a cake and prepare to go to my friends house for dinner. Hope you guys are enjoying your holiday and family!

Thanksgiving

I was on a self imposed strike from blogging. ~If you are on twitter you are well aware of why!~ Anyway, the month is wrapping up and it's almost time to be off work, eating good food and resting and having fun with our families. For me that means "extended family." My genetic/birth family is far away, but that doesn't mean that we don't have family here. From the very first day I set foot in Charlotte, I've been blessed with people that immediately loved me and Tyler and treat us like family. Now I can't imagine how I haven't always known them.

The first Thanksgiving that we were here in 2007, we had two places to go for Thanksgiving dinner. We first had dinner with Pam and her daughter and we ate a ton! After that we went to my friend Nicole's house to have dinner with her family. I don't think I even had a chance to be homesick b/c they both showed us so much love. Last year we had dinner at my house and a few of my friends came over and ate and we watched movies all day.

This year, I purposed in my mind that we have been extremely blessed and we needed to be doing MORE. And giving MORE to others. Sometimes we don't realize the small things that make a difference in people's lives. I've written notecards to people who mean a lot to me. I allowed Tyler to give me some ideas on some people that he wanted to do special things for: carpool teacher, his classmates, the bus driver, his teacher and the person that cleans his classroom. I think throughout the month we have touched most of the people we wanted to let know that we are thankful.

The last thing we are doing for this season is going to a mission on Thanksgiving and assisting with their thanksgiving meals. Since he's so young we won't actually be serving food, but we'll be setting tables, folding napkins, etc. The mission sent out an email about our duties and wanted us to know they plan to treat the guests like VIP. They will not be eating off plastic, etc. they will be eating on fine china with glasses, etc. This makes me so happy!

I think I've briefly touched on that I have volunteered to partner up with a lady who suffers with a mental illness and be her support system. This is supposed to involve, doing activities together, being a listening ear and just being an advocate for her. I am finally going to get to meet her tomorrow for lunch and I'm excited. I think she was a little apprehensive about me over the phone until she found out I was a black woman like she is. But then she seemed excited! She asked me why I wanted to work with her and I told her about my mom's battle with mental illness and I think that made all the difference for her.

I used to be ashamed and wish for a "normal" life and family. And now I realize I got just what I needed and I'm truly thankful and wouldn't trade any of my experiences for anything. I think I've challenged you guys a couple times to do something for someone else. It doesn't take much to write a note card to your mailman or put a small gift card for him or her to get a coffee or lunch. How would you feel if you went through your whole life and nobody appreciated you?

Even though this month is up and my goal is met, I don't plan to stop giving to others just b/c the season is up. I'm going to have to think hard about what we will do for Christmas holidays. I have been asked by a couple individuals what I would like for Christmas. I remember the days when I could rattle off one hundred thigns that I wanted. Now I can't think of one thing.. I've truly been blessed. And that's one of my prayers, for me to be so blessed that I can be a blessing to others!

Fear

A couple days ago, I wrote about the Single's Ministry Seminar that I went to. I used a quote about evaluating yourself and part of that being honest enough to know if you are willing and ready to take the risk involved with relationships.

I'm sure that stuck out with some people b/c you started imagining your last heartbreak and thinking about how you felt, your tears, your emotions, etc. A couple of you didn't feel like you are ready or able to handle that risk at this time. Totally understandable.

How many of us went off to college in a new city? Virtually raise your hands! Ok, so when you were thinking about going to college in a new city, you could possibly be going solo. You'd been living with your parents for 17/18 years and then all of a sudden,you were in a new place on your own. Nobody was going to wake you up everyday. Nobody was going to hold your hand and wipe your tears when you fall off your bike. Of all the "bad" things that could happen to a kid going off to school in a new city, did you concentrate more on the things that scared you and could hurt you OR did you think more about the excitement? The new people, the new city, the new apt/dorm, the new friends and all that you would learn in classrooms to prepare you for a career and being an adult.

If you are like me, you probably didn't give too much thought to the bad things. You were excited and anticipated all the great things about this new stage in your life. So I guess I'm wondering how we are able to go after things we want in life knowing the risks involved, yet love is one of the areas where we just don't have the nerve?

If you decided you wanted a condo, you'd prepare, do your research and get yourself to a point where you are shopping for condos. At any point, you could lose your job, you could get sick and you'd not be able to buy a condo. Or if you did buy the condo, you could still face all these same problems. DO you sit in your apt for the rest of your life being fearful of all the bad things that could happen or do you say "I'm gonna prepare as best I can and I'm gonna trust God that I can handle this condo." So why don't we do the same with love?

I've had plenty of disappointments in the love dept. but some of the heartbreaks are more memorable to me than others. Those are the ones where I probably felt more deeply about the person. For instance, me and my Ex in Baton Rouge broke up in the summer of 2005. It's now 2009 (four years later). Slowly, we've been able to establish a semi friendship. I think he probably hurt me more than anyone else I've dated. And yet guess what? I'm still alive!

I think I told you guys that he recently had a child. I've talk to him about his daughter numerous times and yet last month sometime he sent me some photos of his daughter and for some reason that really tore me up. At a time when I should be totally over my feelings looking at that child really brought on some tears and feelings that i didn't know were there.

But does what he did to my heart back then stop me from getting myself out there to find someone who will treat me as I should be treated? Uh no! I survived right? Nothing has killed me yet and I don't think a relationship will. So, for those of you who said you weren't ready to accept hte potential risk, what makes it easy for you to accept the risks of other areas of your life, but not love? Especially when the "prize" or "reward" would be worth more to you than the other things you go after in life.